Today's prompt: See...
When I look at you, I see your other mom and dad.
It's both precious and sad.
Precious because your other mom and I exchange texts and emails where I tell her what you are doing or send a picture. She responds with, "I do the same exact thing!" I love storing up these special connections to tell you; I share them with you even now, even when you don't understand my words.
When you bite your lower lip, I see your mom.
When you smile so easily and brightly, I see your dad.
They have left their mark on you, your parents. It fills my heart with joy that I am able to see this. That someday, you will be able to see this.
It's so beautiful that you are so like them.
You are so beautiful. Just like your parents. Beautiful inside and out.
But it also hurts my heart. Your loss is still so fresh, and my heart aches for you. In a perfect world, if I could, I would make your life whole and complete. I would give you back the family you so closely resemble. My love for you runs deeper than my own happiness.
I see the beauty that is adoption. The opening of hearts to love a child that is not bone of one's bone and flesh of one's flesh. It's pure love.
But the coin has a flip side. A darker side. I see the sadness that is adoption. The loss of an original family. The severing of a baby from her mother. Not a blessing or destiny. Just brokenness.
We see this. With the hearts of parents, we see clearly the path we will walk to help you with acceptance. While others may not understand, we know we will keep our hearts open and embrace all that makes you you.
Every visit, I take a picture of you three. I hold the words spoken in my heart to someday share with you. How you are like your mom. How you are like your dad. The words of love they say to you. I keep it all for you, my love.
For I see that someday, you will need these memories. You will need these connections. You will want your other parents. We see this, and we know. With open hearts, we fully embrace all that is adoption.